I've always been an anxious person, an over-thinker, a catastrophiser, expecting the worst, then accepting less than the best. It's how I've always operated, it's how my parents encouraged me to think and be and feel.
But lately, I've been wondering if there's something more to it.
Because the blah moments seem to always be peeking around a corner, sneaking in quietly for a quick visit, then wandering away.
Then I rationalise and think "I'm bored, I'm lonely" and head for the kitchen and the stash of chocolate that the kids can't reach.
But in the quiet of the night, when I crawl into bed by myself again, I wonder, is there something wrong with me? Am I ignoring something that I shouldn't be?
And then the sun shines, and I deal with kids arguing as they get ready for school, and Sophie cutting another tooth, and I head out to walk them to school in the sunshine, and I take the time to notice the blue sky and the sun shining, and I think, is it all in my head?
When did you know the feeling was a problem?
When you don't get out of bed, when you no longer notice the beautiful sunshine & blue sky, when you can't admit that your feelings fluctuate . . . then it's a problem! Looks like you're ok right now! Enjoy the good moments, don't dwell on the others & rest when you need to (or when you can!).
ReplyDeleteIt's only a problem if you let it be one! Keep smelling those roses and counting your blessings even if they are just tiny ones!
ReplyDeleteWe are always on a journey of self-discovery :) and it sounds as if you are exploring yours ... Yes, we don't have to continue to be patterned by the often invisible or barely-available-to-consciousness tracks laid down for us in childhood (no blame attached to parents - that's just what happens). But we can become more conscious of them, without judging ourselves, and make different choices as an adult. Sometimes counselling can be helpful in this process. Wishing you courage and energy as you keep moving forward ...
ReplyDeleteYou would be amazed how many people have feelings inside that they think are abnormal but in reality, they are experiencing what many feel. Don't look at it as a problem, look at it as a part of you - your challenge...
ReplyDeleteI can definitely relate to that. But if you're not sure, or it's interfering with how you live your life, go and talk to a doctor or counseller for a mental health check up x #TeamIBOT
ReplyDeleteI can definitely relate to that. But if you're not sure, or it's interfering with how you live your life, go and talk to a doctor or counseller for a mental health check up x #TeamIBOT
ReplyDeleteI always knew I was anxious, but when it became over the top anxiety when I developed pnd and I couldn't function properly or sleep I knew it definitely was a problem.
ReplyDeleteI think the fact that you recognize it makes it less of a problem than you worry about, if that makes sense. Deep breathing, some forward folds, and going easy on yourself - that's what I recommend. :o) xo
ReplyDeleteI think if it's more often than not, you would want to look into it. I can be overly dramatic that's for sure, but I'm not an anxious person. If you're questioning it, I think that probably suggests you might not be happy with that way of thinking. xx
ReplyDeleteFor me it was when I couldn't find joy in anything anymore, and I didn't want to try.
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