Tuesday 9 February 2016

Things I'd Tell My Daughter

Dear Chloe

You set off on your big adventure at the end of this week (I'm guessing not many of your friends are moving to the other side of the country to study)

I know, after chatting to you on the weekend, that you're pretty independent. I mean, you always have been, but you've more or less brought yourself up the last few years, and that means that the adults around you failed you, and I'm sorry.

But I can try to make things better moving forward, if you'll let me.

So let me offer some mum-advice as you head off. Make of it what you will, but I hope you at least take the time to hear me out.

Make a home for yourself I know that you're just going into a dorm room, and you're already worrying about what will happen at the end of the year (as am I), but make that space comfortable (not messy), and take the time to decorate it.

Don't binge Having been a first year student, and worked with first year students, I know the culture. Whether it's food or alcohol, or freedom, don't binge on it. Enjoy life responsibly.

Ask for help This is a tough one, Miss Independent. But you won't have all the answers, and someone else will. Whether it's help with an assessment, or grocery money, it really is ok to ask for help.

Capture memories In twenty years time, when you're safely back in Queensland, thawing out, your children will ask you about your time in Tasmania. Take lots of photos. Write things down in a diary. When you visit Salamanca Markets, write about the overwhelming smells, and the crowds of people. These are the things you will want to remember when your mind is failing.

Explore Tying in with that point above, you need to explore the area. Don't get to Tasmania, and spend every waking moment studying, and every sleeping moment sleeping. Make a plan to down books regularly and hop on a bus or go for a walk, and learn about the historical place around you (and visit the penguins. And the chocolate factory. And the cheese places.)

Remember you are loved I know right now it feels hard. But with the space of distance and time you will see that we all did what we thought was best at the time. Turns out we were wrong, but that doesn't mean we love you any less. Please remember that in those quiet moments of introspection.

Enjoy the adventure I have to keep thinking that this experience has an end in sight, otherwise my mumma-heart might break. But I know that I can't keep you close forever, and have to let you do the growing up you need to do. Above all else, enjoy your adventure.

Love you.

linking up with Essentially Jess


  1. I hope she has a wonderful time in Tassie, it's a stunning place :)

  2. Beautiful Cate. It won't feel like it now, but things do pass, and bridges do get built. As you say time and distance are wonderful healers. Big hugs to you and special wishes to your daughter as she embarks on her special journey. xx

  3. What a lovely letter to a new uni student. Speaking as a Tassie girl, it's a lovely place and she'll have a wonderful time. Sadly though, the chocolate factory has closed its doors! She'll have to come up north to the Anvers one instead. :)

  4. Wonderful advice Tasmania is awesome. I think the binge one is great advice for starting uni. Easy to go overboard in at least one area if not all.

  5. Beautiful advice. I hope that your daughter has a wonderful time in Tasmania.

  6. It sounds like you've both been through a rough time and while the time apart will be hard it will be good for the both of you. Good luck.

  7. Sounds like you have an independent daughter who will enjoy her uni adventure in Tassie and hopefully the distance and time will bring you closer.

  8. I am just so happy you are part of each other's lives again...encourage that independence and she'll always come back! Xx

  9. Nice post! I love the ask for help - thats one of the first things teens stop doing, much to their detriment...


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